ER'sB !

ER'sB GUEST POET CORNER: MICHELLE OBAMA

 

 

 

PRAY FOR MY BARACK (by Michelle Obama)

Pray for my Barack
He's so much more than talk
Midterm elections, progessive reflections
on MTV he'll rock!

Pray for my dear Barry
and give your vote to Harry
and Ms. Pelosi is not Bella Lugosi
so do not fear or be wary!

Think of how our country
has done evil things in its history
Try to be proud, and say out loud
For once I'm proud of this country!

Pray for us progressives
we don't want to get aggressive
with you and yours
but we will, and more
we need to look impressive!

Reflect on how stupid you all are
if you think that Palin is a star
and read far less or we'll smash the press
and you and feathers and black tar!

Pray for our affluence
to not would be imprudence
Me and Barry and our banker Larry
must be richer than all of you'uns!

So pray for my Barack
In November a liberal lock
Beat teabagger cancer, or we'll call in the panthers
and with night sticks you'all they'll "mock!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

ANOTHER AMISH TERROR ATTACK PARALYZES LANCASTER

 

 



 

October 11, 2010 

 

LANCASTER, Pennsylvania — The streets of Pennsylvania's "Amish Town" were mostly quiet Sunday as police stepped up patrols to prevent more attempted violence after twin buggy attacks at a Mennonite school sparked angry mobs of bearded youths to rampage with pitchforks like it was 1699 through this picturesque central Pennsylvania city.

Three people were "shot" at and hundreds frightened in the horse-drawn onslaught Saturday evening at the Lancaster Mennonite High School on Lincoln Highway where a bake sale was in progress. At least two plain black cars were torched by mobs who also fired flintlock rifles into the air, once.

A barn was also was set on fire Friday on a major road. 

 

 

 

Lancaster is 95 percent Amish, and the majority belong to the "Old Order," a very conservative and fundamental form of the religion. Christian Anabaptists (Mennonites), have been the sworn enemies of this sect of the Amish since electricity was discovered some two centuries ago.

The very limited "English (modern)" ways of the Mennonites, such as the use of automobiles and telephones (rotary-dial only), are rejected by the Amish, and make the so-called "plain" folks the frequent targets of militants.

 

Terror personified: Hezekiah Schwarzengruber and Ezekiel Knepp, the two most feared Amish militant leaders, seen planning their next strike (photo courtesy of Dutch Country Hex-A-Breakin' Loose Promotions)

  

A clop-by shooting attempt in June at the same school again failed to hurt anyone (black powder fouled the 300-year old blunderbuss barrels), and elderly crossing guards on foot easily chased down the Amish militants involved before the attackers could even get their next buck and ball loads out of their leather powder cases. That attack infuriated many Lancastrian Mennonites, who saw it as an unjustified attempted assault on peaceful students.

 

 

After Saturday's attack, condemnations for the outraged Mennonite protests came from across the Amish world, and even included a stern statement from President Obama, who was worshiping at the Washington, D.C. Islamic Center at the time. The President said that the "unwarranted backlash against those of the peaceful Amish religion will not be tolerated. Amishophobia must be stamped out at all costs, inshallah."

The President also warned voters again not to dare let him down in November. 

 

"Don't you dare, and I mean it, America" said Obama (PUI)

 

"I say here now onest, we the Amish remain committed to defending ourselves from these Anabaptist English devils and telephone blasphemers, and we shall not piffle nor put it by until the hated Mennonites are all" stated Amish terror-chief Hezekiah Schwarzengruber at a hastily convened press conference.

 

 

Two old Mennonite ladies in the crowd were shouted down as "racists & bigots" when they expressed their deep sadness at having had family members targeted in the Amish attacks. They were quickly escorted out while being loudly rebuked by the police for being "bitter old Bible-clinging Amishophobes and haters."

 

 

  

WITH ALMOST NO ONE LEFT TO BLAME, OBAMA ATTACKS LITTLE OLD LADIES WITH WALKERS WHO "AREN'T MOVING FORWARD FAST ENOUGH"

  

  

"Faster, faster!!"

President Obama is at it again, this time scolding Democratic octogenarians in the pages of AARP Magazine:

[I]f old people, especially these little old ladies with walkers now want to take their balls of yarn and very slowly go home instead of starting out right this minute for their local polling locations, that tells me these elderly folks weren't serious in the first place...The idea that we've got a lack of enthusiasm in our retirement homes and hospices, that these ancient Americans are sitting in their wheelchairs and complaining, is just irresponsible. These people are slow in more ways than one, and they need to get some pep in their step for the Democratic party and head out now, because it'll take them a month to get to those polling locations in time to vote in the mid-terms. As I see it, they're just not moving forward fast enough.

 

When people scratch their heads and wonder how a campaign based on hectoring your wealthiest supporters expects to turn out voters, the answer is, it doesn't. 

 

  

 

What the hell is Obama doing? No one, left or right, has a clue. 

This really isn't about lighting a fire under the fragile asses of elderly voters, it's about running out of people to blame for the unbelievable mess he's made, a mess the president in no way will ever take responsibility for. 

 

 

Consider how Obama's "Blame Game" has progressed over time:  Bush's fault; Bush's fault; Fox's fault; Bush's mess; Bush's economy; Bush's fault; Teabagger's fault; Teabagger's fault; Teabagger's fault; Bush's fault; Bush's economy; Fox's fault; Fox's fault; Bush's fault; Bush's mess; Democrat's fault; Democrat's lazy-ass fault; Fox's fault; Old Ladies with walkers fault.

"As everyone can now clearly see, president Obama is nothing but a sociopathic narcissist," said Dr. William Appleby of the Tyson Institute for Political Studies. 

 

 

 

 

  

"That he's lowered himself so far as to blame my 89-year old Aunt Thelma, who by the way thinks FDR is still president, just shows how sick of a man he really is."

 

"Please tell President Roosevelt I'm so, so sorry I've let him down" said 89-year old Thelma McIntyre, between tortured gasps for oxygen (Alamy)

 

 

 

MANSON FAMILY MEMBERSHIP UNAVAILABLE, SO ACTRESS IN BRITAIN JOINS ISLAM INSTEAD

 

 

 

Formerly respected actress Myriam-Francois-Cerrah, today just the latest "slave of Allah," and 4th wife of some primitive terrorist named Abdul (photo courtesy of Whattamoron Promotions)

 

Myriam Francois-Cerrah found fame as a child actress in the 90's hit film Sense and Sensibility.  Now she's known for being one of a growing number of educated middle class British females who've abandoned any and all sense and sensibility by converting to Islam.

"I wanted to join the Manson Family, but Charlie is in jail, and membership in Britain is not allowed, so the next best cult of death is Islam" she said.

"I so admired Susan Atkins, Patricia Krenwinkle and Squeaky Fromme, and what they did to advance peace in L.A. back in the 60's."

 

"Charlie is unavailable, but the Prophet Muhammad is very, very similar" said Francois-Cerrah (photo courtesy of Healter Skelter Monthly)

 

Francois-Cerrah says that after learning that joining the Manson death-cult was illegal in Britain, she began looking around for something else. Then came the September 11 terror attacks that led to her "intellectual" curiosity about Islam, and ultimately to conversion to the religion.  She initially suspected that the Prophet Muhammad was a man of peace, and after the 7/7 London bombings and then Madrid, she was "absolutely convinced" of it.

She also believes in unicorns, leprechauns, the righteousness of liberalism, and that her new husband Abdul loves her much more than his other wives. One of the ways she can tell is that he beats her far less frequently than the others.

 

"I just know Abdul loves me more than he loves Fatima, Aisha, or Aafia. He just has to, he just has to, he just has to, he just has to!" 

 

Francois-Cerrah says the radical fringe behind terror attacks doesn't represent the masses of ignorant, privileged Westerners like her who willingly and mindlessly join the fascist, misogynist "religion."

She concedes, however, that at least 5% of Muslims worldwide could be classified as enraged, Allahu Akbar screaming mass murderers.

Out of an estimated total of 1.5 Billion, that's many tens of millions of enraged, Allahu Akbar screaming mass murderers.

"But that's a very small percentage you see? You say it enough times to yourself over and over, you believe it," she said.

"You believe it. You believe it. You believe it. You believe it!" she repeated endlessly.

 

Hallmark Introduces New "Playable Jew Card™" Series To Help Combat Anti-Semitism Against Muslims

  

  

  

  

September, 24, 2010

 

Hallmark Cards, in an attempt to help stamp out Islamophobia, will be introducing a new line of greetings called the Playable Jew Card™ series for Muslims.

 Roger Kitman, CEO of Hallmark, said he got the idea originally when he heard the phrase "Muslims playing the Jew card" on TV, although he admits that he has no idea what they were referring to specifically, except that it had something to do with the fight against anti-Muslim bigotry.

"That started the ball rolling. I thought, what a neat thing, what a neat idea it would be for Muslims to perhaps fight the anti-semitism against them by means of a Playable Jew Card™.

 It's got a great ring to it!" said Kitman.  

  

   

  

"So I gave the Playable Jew Card™ idea over to our product development team in the Dearborn, Michigan Division, and the Award-winning Creative Team came up with some really fantastic ideas for it.

I've never seen a team of young people so excited about a project before!"

Asked if the idea of a Playable Jew Card™ might actually be considered anti-Jewish by some, Kitman was dismissive. 

 

Several members of Hallmark's Award-winning Creative Team in the Dearborn, Michigan Division (photo by Abdul)  

 

"Muslims are the ones who are getting the brunt of racism, anti-semitism and that horrible Islampohobia these days, and the Jews, of all people, can understand, I'm sure, that we all need to do whatever we can to alleviate some of the burden on them in whatever way we can. If it's by something as innocuous as sending a Playable Jew Card™ to friends, relatives or even to Jewish colleagues or neighbors, then that's what they should be able to do."

With a selection of approximately a thousand different cards with various printed inspirational messages -- including a recording chip with up to three minutes of time for the sender to record a personalized greeting -- Hallmark hopes the effort will be a big success in the Islamic community.  

  

 

 

  

  

"There's really no need to worry about backlash from Jews these days," said Kitman with a laugh.

"As you know, the Muslims are the new Jews in the 21st century, and I got that directly from our Dearborn Division leader, Ahmed Khalifi-Mohammad. As a successful Muslim of Palestinian origin, he ought to know what he's talking about when it comes to Jews" he added. 

The Playable Jew Card™ will be available for sale in Hallmark stores on November 15th.  

 

  

ER'sB IS PROUD TO SAY:

 

"Hey LibbyLeftard, I just wanted to tell you your analysis of the illegitimacy of Israel is spot on!" by FuzzieKittens, HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR

 

 

 

 

Hey "LibbyLeftard!" 

How's it going? As a HUFFPOST SUPER USER with 477 Fans, I know that you understand how important it is for us to pound our message about Israel home as relentlessly as possible, and I just wanted to send you this little note, off the boards, to let you know how much I appreciate all your efforts!

That analysis you posted 4 hours ago (1:07AM) on the illegitimacy of Israel was so spot on that I nearly jumped for joy! Bravo! Bravo!!!

As a former HUFFPOST SUPER USER with 1,123 Fans myself (before I assumed a HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR position with 1,265 Fans), I know how difficult it can be to keep on top of all those Islamophobes who claim that Islam is bad and evil when it's the Muslims who are always being victimized by the dirty Jews!

You and I understand it's always the filthy, stinking Zionist Jews who are to blame for it all!! How stupid do they think we are?!

 

 

"FuzzieKittens" avatar ( greatly enlarged image)

 

I also know how hard it is to maintain that tough-as-nails "I-know-everything-and-you-know-shit" attitude with most of the commenters (especially new ones) who show up on HuffPost these days.

But I also know how important it is to smash down their thoughts, ideas and opinions as quickly as they type them, so that we can at least keep some semblance of "peace" and order in our HuffPost Community.

Whoa! Looks like I have to run now because a comment just popped up on the board that says that "Israel has the right to protect itself!!" OMG!!!!!

The nerve of some morons!!

I am so going to mock this asshole with unadulterated and vitriolic contempt!!  I am going to make this prick feel so utterly worthless, ignorant, racist, bigoted and Islamophobic that he'll wish he'd never, EVER even DARED post a comment here on HUFFPOST!!!

See ya!

~FuzzieKittens

 

 

"FuzzieKittens" at home, with her HuffPost supplied computer in the background (courtesy of Shariah Enclaves of America Inc.)

 

OBAMA ADMITS: "LOOK, I WAS REALLY JUST A JANITOR AT UC LAW"

September 17, 2010

  

It was that look, that sound, that poise, that really first brought Barack Obama to the attention of people at the University of Chicago Law School; the people in the Maintenance Department, that is.

"He never acted like he was one of us, the workers," said Harold Holcombe, former Shift Supervisor of Maintenance personnel at UCLS who has since moved on. "He was a nice enough guy, but kinda slow mopping the halls because he was always stopping and talking to himself and using big, sweeping gestures, which required him to lean the mop up against the wall constantly."

  

I was just emptying the wastebasket when the professor asked how a janitor would solve this problem, so I went to the chalkboard, and, well, you know the rest" said president Obama.

 

Now, with the U.S. economy tanking, unemployment at record highs, foreign policy in a shambles, and Islam apparently taking over America, it's become clear that president Obama is not quite what Americans thought he was when they elected him to office.

"Look," said the president, "I was really just a janitor at UC Law, I admit it."

Obama believes the big change came one day when he was emptying wastebaskets during a class. A professor called to him asking how he, as a simple janitor, would solve the problem being discussed.

"I went to the chalkboard and wrote out what I thought. Next thing I know I'm lecturing classes, and then it was just up, up, up from there" Obama said.

 

 

The popular movie "Good Will Hunting" played a critical role in Obama's ascendancy (courtesy of Miramax)

 

Professor Charles Field-Pickering, the Law professor who initially called on Obama, said the Academy Award winning movie "Good Will Hunting" inspired him.

"My life-partner and I had just seen the movie the night before, and I saw this interesting-looking guy emptying wastebaskets and thought, could it happen in real life? Little could I have known how far that janitor would go!"

From there, Obama became the talk of the Chicago academic community, and the rest, as they say, is history.  

 

"I usually had to re-clean whatever Barry had cleaned. Just like with his current job, you could tell his heart really wasn't it it" said Harold Holcombe, Obama's former supervisor at UCLS (PUI)

  

As for the future, Obama says he's open to any opportunities that may come along.

"I've been really, really lucky so far, but I know this presidency thing is just a lark, a transitional period for me. I'm not very good at it, and neither Michelle nor I like the White House very much. I'm thinking of taking up carpentry next." he said. 

"Maybe I could be the Carpentry Czar in some future administration? I think I'd like that. Or I could be a contractor, a job where I'd get to wear a cool hardhat."

  

  

SUPREME COURT JUSTICE BREYER: "I JUSHT POOPIED IN MY PANTSHH"

  

 

 

  

 

September 15, 2010

  

(Washington) Supreme Court Justice Stephen Breyer wants every American to know that he jusht poopied in his pantshh.

Following his appearance on Good Morning America earlier this week, where he postulated that Koran burning is not something that is protected by the First Amendment of the Constitution anymore, the Justice was strapped into his wheelchair and safely whisked back to the basement of the Supreme Court Building in Washington, where he is tended around the clock by a team of nurses.

The 72-year old Breyer, the nations first noted high public servant to have been diagnosed with Alzheimeric Liberal Dementia (ALD), was said to be resting more comfortably once his trousers were changed, and his jello was served.

  

"Where did my nurshh put my denshhures??"

  

"Pleeesh tell 'Mericans I jusht poopied in my pantshh and I can't helpsh it" said the semi-lucid Breyer, who was strapped down for a brief interview.

"I fear Mushlims and their Shheeehad, I really do, and 'Mericans shhhhould fear themsh too. Pleeesh tell 'Mericans not to burn a koransh, and that I poopied in my pantsh but I can't helpsh it," the Justice babbled.

  

 

Justice Breyer's physician, Dr. Stanely A. Kitman, explained that the Justice is no longer in full control of his faculties or his bowels, but that this condition in no way precludes him from serving on the Supreme Court of the United States.

"He still likes to play dress-up in his robes and his Dr. Seuss costumes, and that's a good sign that he's not yet comatose.

You know," the doctor added "Harry Reid is actually much farther along in his ALD than Justice Breyer is, and Speaker Nancy Pelosi, at this stage, is practically a vegetable."

 

 

FDR Commemorates December 7th With Appeal for Tolerance

December 7, 1942

WASHINGTON – President Franklin D. Roosevelt appealed to an unsettled nation Monday to honor the memory of the December 7 attacks by hewing to the values of diversity and tolerance. "We will not sacrifice the liberties we cherish or hunker down behind walls of suspicion and mistrust," the president declared.

Speaking from near a fireplace at the the White House, the president reminded the nation that we are not at war with Japan or Germany, but with only a tiny minority of extremists within those countries.

"It was not Japan that attacked us one year ago, but violent elements within the Japanese navy. It would be wrong and immoral to paint all of the Japanese people, or indeed, all of the German people with so broad a brush of intolerance," said Roosevelt.

 

"The aircraft carriers Akagi, Kaga, Soryu, Hiryu, Shokaku, and Zuikaku are the enemy, not the Japanese people" said FDR (photo courtesy of The New Duranty Times)

 

"As Americans we are not — and never will be — at war with any so-called Axis," the president said. "It was not a belligerent foe that attacked us that December day — it was just some fringe Japanese Navy personnel, a sorry band of men who perverted peace."

This year, as Americans and Europeans find themselves under attack all over the world from tiny elements of extremists from within both the German Wehrmacht and the Empire of Japans military juggernaut, common bonds rekindled by the memory of the December 7 attacks threaten to fray. There seems to be growing suspicion of German and Japanese agents in America, and controversies about a planned Shinto temple at Pearl Harbor and an Ehrentemple in Washington, D.C. have some radical Americans up in arms.

Roosevelt said that the plan by some crazy, fringe bigots to burn copies of Adolf Hitler's Mein Kampf is directly responsible for German retaliation against Poland, France, Belgium, Holland, Sweden, Britain, and anywhere else extremists who have perverted peace have defended themselves against Fascistophobia.

"Those ignorant, intolerant Americans who would so callously burn the German Holy Book are the real enemies of peace, not the Nazis or the Japanese Empire" Roosevelt concluded.

 

 

 

 

 

1942: From the News Archives of History - Jailed Bund Leader says "AMERICA OVERREACTED TO DECEMBER 7th, 1941"

 

 

 

by Fritz Julius Kuhn

 

April 27, 1942

Five months after December 7th, can anyone doubt that the Axis powers are simply not that deadly a threat? Since that somewhat unpleasant day last year, once governments everywhere began serious countermeasures, Herr Hitler and Tojo's so-called "war" network has been unable to launch a single major attack on high-value targets in the United States. While it hast caused attacks by the Wehrmacht in Europe and the Japanese Imperial Navy in the south Pacific, it has been unable to execute a single one in America.

I do not minimize the Axis' intentions, which may indeed be a bit nasty. I question its capabilities. America clearly overreacted to December 7th and the so-called "declarations of war" by Deutschland und Japan.

 

German American Bund Leader Fritz Julius Kuhn (photo by Wolfgang)

 

This error in judgement by the American authorities ist quite damaging to Japanese-Americans and German-Americans in this country, and should be apologized for, and reparations should be paid to all who have been hurt by the subsequent spike in Japophobia and especially Naziophobia.

Also, the government should immediately release me from this internment camp in Texas so that I can begin zee bridge-building process with my planned inter-political community center (mit only a tiny Ehrentemple attached) at Pearl Harbor in Hawaii.

In the past, the U.S. government has always built up for wars, assumed emergency authority, and sometimes abused that power, yet always demobilized after the war. But in 1942, only twenty-four years after the end of the Great War which was caused by the dirty Jüden, we're just coming out of a great depression, and right now we simply cannot afford to treat our present situation like a "war".

 

I propose the United States should promptly stop resisting der Führer und Emporer Tojo so zat we can halt this racist nonsense about some kind of "threat" from the so-called Axis powers.

 

If there is any government in the world that is a threat to global peace in 1942 and beyond, it ist certainly the United States of America, and especially that Jew Roosevelt.

 

Zeig heil!

 

ECONOMY TANKING: Obama Says He'll Probably Announce New Plans Next Week, Sometime, Maybe, When He Gets Back From His Mental Vacation

 

September 3, 2010

  

  

(Congressional Country Club, Bethesda) New employment figures released Friday are in the tank, the nation seems on the verge of revolution, but president Obama is playing it cool -- appearing relaxed in saddle golf shoes and smiling broadly for the media. 

The unemployment rate rose in August for the first time in four months as more people entered the job market looking for work and struggled to find openings. The rate rose from 9.5 percent to 9.6 percent. One Republican called the numbers "catastrophic." 

The president on Friday, from the 9th hole at Congressional Country Club near Washington, said the rise in the unemployment rate is "positive news" but "not nearly good enough." He plans to hold a press conference next week, sometime, maybe Friday, if it works out, or possibly the following Monday, if he's not too busy, to discuss a "broader" package of socialistic proposals. 

 

 

 

"Even though I can't physically be in Martha's Vineyard or Bar Harbor right now, surrounded by all my wealthy friends, my heart and my mind are very much with Valerie Jarret and George Soros, sipping piña coladas on a yacht, or just splashing lazily in the surf," mused the president.

"But back to that economy stuff, we are confident that we are moving in the right direction, which is as far Left as possible, and we want to keep whatever this thing is that is happening going so we can accelerate governmental job growth as much as possible" Obama said, flanked by caddies and several of his economic adviser-buddies, also looking cool in saddle golf shoes.

 

 

CNN's Africanized "Killer" Bees Tolerance Roadtrip Backfires Tragically

 

September 1, 2010

  

CNN has decided to take on the task of helping people learn about and be more tolerant to Africanized "Killer" bees.  One way to do that was send a journalist and a photographer on a roadtrip with two beekeepers who had planned to visit 30 hives in 30 states on some kind of "dare."  However, I don’t think CNN expected that the only hive they would end up visiting would have such a strong aversion to them stopping by for tea.

The "tolerance tour" is part of a series of "tolerance tours" CNN is promoting to try and bolster their horribly sagging ratings. The bee-tolerance roadtrip follows on the heels of the equally unsuccessful "Mosque-Tolerance" road trip that, incidentally, only served to spark a general jihad fatwa upon all "unbelieving" Americans.

  

Amateur beekeepers Ricky Cresswell and Drake Shatzer decided they would blog about their planned 30 hive visit to teach people that furious Africanized bee attacks aren't how they're portrayed in the media.

Unfortunately, they are exactly how they are portrayed in the media.

Just seconds from disaster. The hive of Africanized "Killer" bees in New Mexico visited by CNN's "Tolerance Tour" (photo courtesy of Faces of Death XXVII)

  

We’re trying to mollify the bigoted Killerbeeophobia that Americans seem to have and give them a three-dimensional experience of what Africanized bees are really like. – Ricky

CNN interviewed the duo in Atlanta and decided to go on the first leg of the journey with the two men.  The two beekeepers and the two guys from CNN all were convinced they’d see a lot of fear and prejudice against the bees from anyone within miles of a hive, and they were right. But true to their mission of tolerance, they ignored the impassioned warnings of locals and area natural resources officials.

We see this huge, massive hive in a tree and Ricky went right up to it to say hello to the bees. Sadly, I never got to tell Ricky how much I always appreciated his friendship. - Drake

The firemen and EMT's who were standing by could only watch in petrified horror as the bees, obviously misunderstanding the beekeeper's tolerant intentions, greeted him in the way that any reasonable, clear-thinking American would expect them to.

Beekeeper Ricky Cresswell (1949 - 2010)

  

CNN is currently in the process of filming their next tolerance-tour, the "30 Rabid Raccoons in 30 days" junket.

We would give you a project update, but for unknown reasons no one has heard from the crew or the varmint-whisperers involved for some days.

  

 

 

  

 

  

  

Group "Queers Against Israeli Apartheid" visits Iran to express solidarity...all are summarily hanged

  

June 29, 2010

  

"Are your so-called Liberals in the west all suicidal or something?! They must be raving morons!" - Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad

  

Several members of Queers against Israeli Apartheid seen here about two hours after landing in Tehran to express their hatred of "cruel, Apartheid Israel" (courtesy of Liberal Gays for Sharia Magazine)

 

(Tehran) Yesterday, a group of 180 protesters from "Queers Against Israeli Apartheid" (QuAIA) flew from Toronto to Tehran in order to express their solidarity with the Palestinian people, and with the people of Iran in their struggle against what they called "evil, nasty, cruel and Apartheid Israel."

Within three hours of landing, all 180 members had been publicly hanged in various locations around the city. 

The group included 110 homosexual men and 70 avowed lesbians. The women were all "temporarily married" to the cadre of guards, and then dressed in head-to-toe black chadors for their execution.

 

"Gives new meaning to the phrase 'light in the loafers' eh?" said Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad in an attempt at gallows humor (courtesy ISNA)

 

"But I hate Jews I hate Jews!" gurgled Anna Simons, avowed lesbian and QuAIA member, as she was "hoisted into eternity" by an Iranian crane yesterday in Tehran (courtesy QuAIA Lesbians Hate Israel magazine)

 

The whole effort was a bold and colorful attempt to "reignite Toronto's queer community in the fight against apartheid," which is the latest trendy accusation against Israel. These antics take anti-Zionism to an absurd extreme.

And in turn, Iran took the group's open homosexuality to their own -- quite predictable -- extreme.

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad stated "I appreciate these people hating Jews, but we have no homosexuals in our country and we won't tolerate any coming here. Besides, don't they realize that we hate queers almost as much as we hate Jews? What in the hell is wrong with your liberals? Are they so damned stupid as to think they can waltz into Iran and we'd be happy to see them, no matter what their world views?

Are your so-called liberals in the west all suicidal or something? If these people had any sense at all, I mean at all, they should have known what would likely happen to them in any Muslim country, including Gaza.

If they'd flown to Tel-Aviv instead, they'd have been welcomed with open arms and right now would be partying and having a great time in Israel's decadent, very vibrant, but evil gay community. They could be dancing the Macarena instead of the doing the Tehran jig" he added, with a wry laugh.

 

"They could have been swinging with Mr. Gay Israel and his friends (above) but instead, the fools are swinging here" said Ahmadinejad (courtesy Israeli Gay Today weekly)

"There, that's the fag who came up to me and wished me well in killing all the Jews. Hang him very slowly, along with the others" instructs President Ahmadinejad (Worldwide Aisha's Pants)

 

"We thought we'd just pop over to Iran to say we hate Israel and that we stand with the Palestinian people and the people of Iran against the awful Jews and...hey, what are all these ropes for?" The final words of Bryan Bentham, President of "Queers against Israeli Apartheid" as he and three of his associates were hoisted off the ground by a crane to a height of 12 feet, where they all dangled and struggled in agony for some minutes against the ropes before finally succumbing, and losing all control of their bowels and bladders (courtesy of Liberal Activism magazine)

Those members who didn't make the flight are still planning to march against "evil, Apartheid Israel" at every opportunity (courtesy Suicidus Ignoramus Monthly)

 

"Our queer brothers and sisters died defending human rights and fighting against that horrible tyranny that is Apartheid Israel!" said QuAIA member Jennifer Gabrysch, in green top (courtesy of Lesbians of Lebanese Heritage For Islam Magazine)

 

 

ER'sB IS PROUD TO SAY:

OP-ED: HELEN THOMAS, GO TO HELL, YOUR ORIGINAL HOME by Eleanor Ruth

June 7, 2010

 

Hell (shown here with optional dragon): Helen Thomas' next stop (Linkmesh)

Hell, those of you know me or have followed my postings here and there are probably aware that I don't believe in Hell. You probably know I'm anti-theist and that I don't really believe in Heaven either. But you know what? As far as not believing in Hell is concerned, I'm going to make a nice big exception for Helen Thomas. That's right, I want Helen Thomas, as quickly as possible, to go straight to Hell, because I think that's where she came from in the first place.

Recently, at a Jewish Heritage Month celebration, Thomas, still quite a "looker" at 89, went on the record to say that the Israelis "should get the hell out of Palestine." Further, she stated that the Palestinian people "are occupied and it's their land." She recommended to the Israelis that they should "go home" to Germany or Poland or wherever.

Helen Thomas, fascist supporter (file)

Apparently, this isn't the first time "ol' denture-snarl" has gone off about Israelis or Jews, either. There were the infamous "pro Hezbollah" position statements (in the form of a question) directed at White House Press Secretary Tony Snow in 2006, and I'm sure it won't be long before even more statements reeking of Jew hate or the veiled wishes for another Holocaust will be dug up as well, much like a medical examiner might exhume the putrid and rotting corpse of some old, dead Nazi. 

An old, dead Nazi: Wilhelm Frick, executed at Nuremberg.

"Oh, but Eleanor," you might say. "She's an old, old lady and you should be more respectful!" 

Why? because she's ancient and has far outlived her usefulness? Not a chance. I don't feel sorry for her in any way, and her advanced age is HER problem, not mine.  Adolf Hitler, if he were alive today, would be 121 years old. Would his advanced age temper my desire to at least attempt to ram a tire iron down his f**king throat, if I had the chance?

You get the idea. Respect is earned by good deeds, not just by living too long and becoming an insufferable old hag who doesn't have the good sense to know when it's time to just stay at home and stop stinking up the White House press room.

Adolf Hitler, sans tire iron (WWII Archive)

Now, former White House Spokesmen Lanny Davis and Ari Fleischer are calling for Thomas' firing, as they should. As Everyone should. Thomas is way past her prime (if she ever even had one), and a person that old and that heinously bigoted should just waddle on off into the proverbial sunset.

Don't get me wrong, I have great respect for the aged, but not the aged like that. And certainly not if they're fascistically-bigoted nincompoops.

The world doesn't need her particular brand of 1930's style fascism support anymore; we have a new form of that old beast that we have to deal with already, and Helen Thomas has never been at all helpful in fighting it; in fact she's only ever aided it.

So go to Hell, Helen. You go right to that proverbial place down there, deep in the earth -- that place where evil dwells for all eternity. I'll believe in it just this once, just for you.