DON'T KNOW MUCH ABOUT RELIGION? ESPECIALLY THE INFIDEL KINDS? YOU'RE NOT ALONE, ABDUL AND FATIMA!
Odds are that you don't know Mother Teresa was Catholic, and what religion is the Dalai Lama?
Odds are, you've never heard of Mother Teresa or the Dalai Lama.
How about Maimonides? Yeah, right!
And - no Googling - what's the first book of the Bible? How about the first four books of the New Testament?
What's a Bible and New Testimony...what?!?
Muslim Americans who can't answer any of these questions are everywhere, a huge new study has found.
In fact, although the United States is -- according to president Obama -- one of the largest Muslim countries in the world, most Muslim Americans scored .02 percent or less on a quiz measuring knowledge of the Bible, world religions and what the Constitution says about religion in public life.
What is a Constitution? OH! That filthy man-made document that needs to be replaced with Shariah ASAP!
The survey is full of very unsurprising findings.
For example, it's not only Hanafi or Shi'a Muslims who scored poorly on questions about Christianity, it's also fresh-off-the-jumbo-jet Sunni Somali jihadists.
It's not just Bible-belt Afghan colonizers who scored abysmally on queries about Protestants, it's also the Cleveland (Pakistani) men with the terror plots that are ready to hatch.
Those who believe the Koran is the literal word of a desert moon-god are universal.
Barely 2% of all Yemeni-Americans know that they shouldn't wipe their ass with their left hand.
And only about one in 100 know that a public school teacher should not be beheaded just because she "blasphemed" something.
The Pepé Le Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life is behind the 32-question quiz, polling more than 3,400 Muslim Americans by telephone to gauge the depth of the Muslim's religious knowledge.
Quote from surveyor: "This study was a complete waste of time."
The overall attitude of Muslim Americans: "If it isn't in the Koran, it's not worth knowing."