September 17, 2010
It was that look, that sound, that poise, that really first brought Barack Obama to the attention of people at the University of Chicago Law School; the people in the Maintenance Department, that is.
"He never acted like he was one of us, the workers," said Harold Holcombe, former Shift Supervisor of Maintenance personnel at UCLS who has since moved on. "He was a nice enough guy, but kinda slow mopping the halls because he was always stopping and talking to himself and using big, sweeping gestures, which required him to lean the mop up against the wall constantly."
I was just emptying the wastebasket when the professor asked how a janitor would solve this problem, so I went to the chalkboard, and, well, you know the rest" said president Obama.
Now, with the U.S. economy tanking, unemployment at record highs, foreign policy in a shambles, and Islam apparently taking over America, it's become clear that president Obama is not quite what Americans thought he was when they elected him to office.
"Look," said the president, "I was really just a janitor at UC Law, I admit it."
Obama believes the big change came one day when he was emptying wastebaskets during a class. A professor called to him asking how he, as a simple janitor, would solve the problem being discussed.
"I went to the chalkboard and wrote out what I thought. Next thing I know I'm lecturing classes, and then it was just up, up, up from there" Obama said.
The popular movie "Good Will Hunting" played a critical role in Obama's ascendancy (courtesy of Miramax)
Professor Charles Field-Pickering, the Law professor who initially called on Obama, said the Academy Award winning movie "Good Will Hunting" inspired him.
"My life-partner and I had just seen the movie the night before, and I saw this interesting-looking guy emptying wastebaskets and thought, could it happen in real life? Little could I have known how far that janitor would go!"
From there, Obama became the talk of the Chicago academic community, and the rest, as they say, is history.
"I usually had to re-clean whatever Barry had cleaned. Just like with his current job, you could tell his heart really wasn't it it" said Harold Holcombe, Obama's former supervisor at UCLS (PUI)
As for the future, Obama says he's open to any opportunities that may come along.
"I've been really, really lucky so far, but I know this presidency thing is just a lark, a transitional period for me. I'm not very good at it, and neither Michelle nor I like the White House very much. I'm thinking of taking up carpentry next." he said.
"Maybe I could be the Carpentry Czar in some future administration? I think I'd like that. Or I could be a contractor, a job where I'd get to wear a cool hardhat."